Step 4: Making First Contact and Crafting the Right Message

Whether you are approaching a Sugar Daddy on a sugar dating website or responding to a message he sent to you, this is your opportunity to catch his attention and start your prospective relationship.

Don’t settle for any general chit chat or unmemorable conversations. Have a good look at his profile and, after you get the pleasantries out of the way, show him that you really pay attention and are interested in him as well by inserting the information you gathered into the conversation.

You need to take your time creating personalized messages for each Sugar Daddy, which reveal a little of your personality, while, also, raising his interest. You should take your time re-reading your messages to ensure you are being polite and using correct grammar, as wealthy gentlemen expect Sugar Babies to be knowledgeable and well-behaved, so they can accompany them on social functions.  If you’re unsure about something, grammar-wise, use a grammar-checking tool or a dictionary to make sure everything is written properly and you don’t make an unfavorable first impression.

Sugar dating isn’t something to be afraid of, but if you think going online and flashing your smile or flaunting your body will score you a Sugar Daddy quickly, then that is your first mistake when getting into the lifestyle.  Sugar dating takes time, dedication and effort. It all starts at the first contact, and unfortunately this is where it all ends for a lot of inexperienced Sugar Babies.

Reaching out and starting a conversation isn’t something that comes easily to everyone in the real world, and approaching an older, wealthier man online isn’t easy by any means. The ideal Sugar Baby needs to come across as someone who is highly educated, well-versed in several subjects and mild-mannered. Using good grammar, whether it comes naturally or you use a tool like Grammarly to check it, can go a long way in the world of sugar dating, as incorrectly written messages tend to be ignored more often, but that isn’t the only box you need to check in order for your message to stand out among hundreds of others.

Sugar Daddies have several other common turn offs aside from bad grammar. One of them is Babies that start discussing arrangement terms and expectations even before they introduce themselves properly. Sugar Daddies know they are supposed to be the breadwinner in a relationship, and you’ve probably already stated your expectations in your profile, so there’s no need to lead with that, as it will only scare Sugar Daddies away.

Reading your prospective Sugar Daddy’s profile carefully will provide many clues about him, his personality and expectations. This will help you decide if the Sugar Daddy is really someone you see yourself having any kind of future with, as well if you are someone that could potentially provide him what he needs. If His profile is blank or your expectations don’t match up, then it’s probably a good idea not to contact this Sugar Daddy, as it will likely be a waste of time for both of you.

There are several formulas you can use when making your first contact with your potential Sugar Daddy. One such strategy is to ask him a question, perhaps about something that was mentioned in his profile. This works because questions usually call for answers, which should get him talking more easily. It doesn’t hurt that everyone, and particularly successful men, likes to talk about themselves, so it’s very likely that you can get him engaged in conversation this way.

Another strategy is to lead the conversation with a compliment. You may praise his profile photo, his writing or his preferences, if you share any. Try to find a mutual interest, a truly original compliment or at least something that shows you paid attention to him and that there might be a connection between you. Stroking his ego will earn you some points, but be careful not to overdo it, because that is something opportunists do, and these men recognize one when they see them.

You should remember that your goal with these conversations is to eventually get asked on a date, so you should end the conversations on a high, civil note, so that he is left thinking about you and wanting to know more. You should literally have the man counting the hours until your next chat.

You should set a specific time for your next chat, like telling him you will talk again tomorrow, and say goodbye with a cute picture meant just for him, which will help build the anticipation in the meantime. Photos are a great way to build interest, but they should be cute and flirty, not overly sexual. If these men were looking for escorts, then they would have signed up for an entirely different kind of website.

While it may seem a little forward to do it, giving him an opening to ask you out right in your first message exchange isn’t a bad idea at all. You can do this by talking about a restaurant that serves his favorite kind of food and showing interest in going there. You can also mention a shared hobby and suggest doing it together sometime. You could even show an interest in one of his hobbies and ask if he would be able to teach you.

His response to this last strategy is very important, as it will let you if he feels a connection too. He might be vague, and that might only mean you’ve probably suggested this too early, but he could also be letting you down easy. Being able to read his signals will save you time and help you avoid an embarrassing rejection in the future.

No matter what your approach is, you need to make your first contact sound as flirty and light-hearted as possible. The goal here is to catch his attention, build interest and create a relationship. The rest will come after you establish your connection and start going on dates.

For now, get working on your grammar and your first contact strategies. I’ll see you back here soon to discuss Step 5 of your Sugar Baby dating guide.

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